The (Real) Cost of Doing Business As A Woman
Girl Maths Gone Bad
I haven’t been able to get my hair dyed in four months.
Not because I’m having a radical natural beauty awakening. But because I couldn’t afford to. Sports camp needed paying. The Revenue came knocking. A painter was owed money. Everything else was a priority. So my hair went to the bottom of the list.
And it felt truly LIBERATING. For the days I wasn’t in meetings or on calls. But not so much when it came to actual in-person meetings. I felt less polished. Less presentable. Less plausible, less professional, somehow.
Let’s talk about that cost.
No one warns you that as a “Working Woman”, you have to pay a figurative and literal “appearance tax”. You have to pay to “look the part.”
And “looking the part” includes: your roots, your skin, your make-up, your outfit, your smell, your nails (and the cost of all that appointment time) to create an aura of effortlessness that is now expected in the workplace. It seems utterly frivolous, but your manicure may impact how seriously you are taken. And these are just the costs we are comfortable speaking to…the world of cosmetic enhancements, tweakments and treatments has changed the playing field - and our expectations. Despite costing multiples of a high-end skincare regime, we do not mention these. They are hinted at, guessed at, but honest, public discourse? There is a collective silence.
Meanwhile, male counterparts are embracing grey streaks as “Silver Foxes” and being called “distinguished.” A suit- and shirt- upgrade bi-annually will suffice…and maybe a light-touch cleanser and moisturiser.
And it's not about vanity. It’s the unspoken currency of credibility. The more “together” you look, the more authority you seem to have. It’s the double-edged sword of perception. Yes, you can use your image to communicate on your behalf (I love talking about the strategy of “power dressing” and personal branding), but it’s not so generous on the flip-side. The capitalist and consumer-driven culture we exist in means that if you’re not “put together” (ie; spending thousands on beauty and grooming and fitness products), you may be subconsciously judged for not being driven or professional or ambitious or competent.
But the absolute kicker for me is that these costs aren’t deductible. They don’t show up on invoices. They’re not covered by your client retainer. But they’re essential overhead. For example, I am delivering a 6-week long training programme shortly that requires me to host a series of in-person workshops. My fee is the fee for the delivery of the programme. Not for the hair appointments, nail appointments, make-up replenishment and possible wardrobe enhancements. And yet, I am expected to show up with a certain amount of “verve”; it’s partly why I was booked.
It’s time we started naming them. Claiming them. Charging more because of them and not in spite of them.
Because if I’m investing in a set of gel-nails and phi-brows just to feel like I’m going to be taken seriously, believe me, that is not a personal expense. That is a professional expense.
Let’s start treating it like one.
Hands-up below if any/ all of these apply to you and if there are any I’m missing….
Checklist: The (Semi-Ridiculous) Cost of Being a Businesswoman
Hair colouring = Every month/ every quarter + root sprays for in-between
Nails = Every 6 weeks if you REALLY look after them
Workwear that fits for one time of the month and workwear that fits for the other time of the month
Makeup = replenishment every 4 weeks for primer, foundation, concealer…every 8 weeks for powder, setting spray, mascara
Skincare = replenish every 3 months for your basic routine/ THE SKY IS THE LIMIT for any facial/ laser/ micro-needling programmes
Statement earrings (for the bad hair/ skin/ makeup days)
Comfortable heels + high heels + commuting flats + pedicures the minute the sun comes out
Fitness = premium for most convenient gym/ studio in proximity to office or home so you can ACTUALLY use it
Brows = monthly and/ or (expensive) maintenance appointments for permanent brows
Hair removal = never-ending (laser hair removal is definitely a pyramid scheme)
Lashes = monthly extensions for 6 months solid + premium regrowth gels and tools to recover from all the damage
Opportunity cost/ lost of all that appointment time
I am EXHAUSTED just reading that list…